I was hit with a revelation on Saturday.
I started the day like I start far too many of them, with a pounding headache. I've been in two car accidents where I suffered from whiplash, and ever since have had a lot of headache trouble. Most notably, when I wake up in the morning. So it's no rare thing. However, I hate taking medicine. I hate the idea of loading more chemicals into my body and numbing myself to that medicine from overuse. So I try very hard not to just pop an ibuprofen when these headaches happen.
But Saturday was a WEDDING day. I didn't want to arrive feeling miserable and incapable. So I popped a few pills and washed them down with caffeine.
Hours later, my head was still pounding as I rolled into the parking lot for Brandi and Chris' wedding.
A funny thing happened while we were hanging out in Brandi's getting ready room. My headache started bothering me a lot less. By the time we arrived at the ceremony site, I hardly noticed it. When the wedding began, it was gone.
As the night went on, I was feeling better and better. I attribute this completely to that feeling of inspiration and motivation I feel when I use my camera. Now don't get me wrong, shooting a wedding is exhausting work. Without fail, my muscles will be aching the next day. But when I got into my car at the end of Brandi and Chris' wedding, as I do with most weddings, I was completely invigorated. I blasted the radio and continued the dance party on my drive home and when I got there, Erik remarked on how I seemed to be feeling much better. That's pretty remarkable after a very physically demanding, nine hour day.
I think about when I was a teacher and felt completely drained, completely empty by the end of every day. I think about all the afternoons I drove home, forgetting to turn on the radio because I was so distracted with my worries. I think about how I couldn't even spare the mental energy to write in the blog I used to love. I was completely stifled and trust me, my headaches never got better as the day went on.
Today is just another day to be thankful for following a dream. Thankful for couples like Brandi and Chris who make me feel welcome on their most important day, for a husband who supports me as I wade through these scary but rewarding waters, and thankful to finally be in a place that feels right.