Last Week

You guys, I didn't blog last week! What in the what! 

Let me tell you why. 

Last week was wacky crazy nutso. 

I promised not to inundate my blog with pregnancy/baby posts, but it's become extremely difficult since pregnancy/baby things have inundated my life. You have no idea how excited I am to get some shooting in next month for some clients, if only so that I can focus on photography for a change! 

So the weekend before last AND this previous weekend were consumed by baby showers, one for family and one for friends. They were both lovely and everyone who came was super sweet and unbelievably generous with gifts (we have SO much STUFF). But wowzers does a shower take it out of me. Everyone knows I am not one to be the center of attention voluntarily. But you don't really have much of a choice at your own baby shower. You kind of have to just deal and be grateful ;) So I dutifully opened my gifts and chatted with everyone and answered all their baby questions. And as nice as it all was, it was definitely a relief when it was over haha.

But in between those two Saturdays, I just had an extremely stressful week. I was trying to do too much. Spring is here, and that's usually a very motivating and project-oriented time for me. That's when I do all sorts of business things, house improvements, vacation planning, whatever! And I got a little carried away last week and tried to do A LOT. I ended up in a ton of physical pain and the accompanying emotional breakdown that happens when I reach my limits. Erik came home one day from work to find this emotional wreck of a wife and it was because of a million tiny things, but basically I'd been cleaning and moving things all day... seriously that was it.

While I CAN clean the bathrooms and mop the floors, etc. it's unbelievable how it wipes me out. And then the things I CAN'T do?? Like, move a heavy box out of the way or get something on the top shelf of the cabinets that I'd normally hop onto the counter for or paint Willow's room or put together another new piece of furniture (these are never ending)... these are the moments when I mentally break. I just find it so frustrating and soul sucking to be so limited and dependent on others. I hate asking for help with every fiber of my being... DESPISE it. And yet, if I don't, I just can't get some of this stuff done. And nothing's worse to me than feeling incapable or incompetent. I know it's a dramatic picture, but I feel like someone put handcuffs on my hands and weights on my ankles, told me to relax, and yet all the same daily expectations remained. 

So that was the first half of the week. Erik was so freaked out by my pity party that he made dinner for us in a desperate plea to make me calmer. And then the second half of the week was a nightmare with the vet. Basically, what I thought was a simple appointment with the vet... you know, maybe an hour visit tops? Turned into 18 hours of Lily at the vet and 8 hours of wandering around Short Pump or sitting in my car waiting for me (to be clear, they told me it would take up to 2 hours and I should hang around and wait... if I'd known it would be 8 hours I would have just gone home like a normal person!). This didn't really help after the week I'd been having. 

So it was quite a week. And even writing it down doesn't seem nearly as bad as it felt. But including every pathetic anecdote wouldn't help anyone, so let's just be glad the week is over... and a new one is here. I'll post something a little less cynical and "woe is me" next time. I promise!